What Rules Do You Wish To Break

I wish to break ALL the rules. Every single should or have to, every regulation or standard or principle or law I have constructed, anything that measures who I am and what I do against some prescribed guide for conduct or action.


I wish to let all that go, to simply be present for myself, to give myself what I need, to take care of myself, to be gentle and kind, open and curious.

There are rules that are for our benefit... and there are "implied" rules that are put into place by people scared of the "unknown", who feel more comfortable if everyone fits into a nice neat little box. Like my mother telling me I should "dress my age"... cut my hair because I'm "too old" for long hair... stay at a job that makes me sick every day because making money is the most important thing in life and I should just "take whatever I can get and stop dreaming"...

There are plenty of other people trying to enforce these sorts of "rules" onto others because they are too scared to go for their own dreams, they are traps that will drag me down, and have for many years, but the older I get the more I realize that what other people think has nothing to do with me. Their opinion of me is a reflection of them, not me. 

As a simple example, sometimes I’m already hungry for lunch at 10:30 am, but I struggle with the decision to eat because lunch isn’t until 12:00 pm. In those moments, I often choose the rule over what I need, over caring for myself, and I either don’t eat when I’m actually hungry because “I’m not supposed to yet,” or I do eat and I beat myself up a little for it, (because then when I’m hungry again at 2 or 3 pm, what am I supposed to do?). And yes, I know this makes me sound like a crazy person…

I feel the same about "rules" that art should be done or look a certain way.. every person on earth is creative in their own way, and anything they do creatively is going to be done in their own way, no rules should limit the gift that was given to them as an individual.